February 1st, 2006
meet your match.com?
Almost a month ago I signed up on match.com. My goal was simply to expand my opportunities to meet someone. In short, the experience has been educational and depressing.
Match.com is ok? I did a bit of research, as I usually do. Match.com seemed to be a good balance. They had a decent profile system and weeded out many. The profile seemed informative enough without takeing forever to fill out like eharmony.com. The weeding out occurred mostly due to having to fill out a profile at all and having a fee. This filters out the least serious people.
Not really. Good reviews were very hard to find. Match.com, from ~600 reviews, gets a little over 2 out of 5 stars, this is bad for those not familiar with the standard star rating system. For the most part, I would say most people reviewing were just dissapointed with the fact that dating, online or otherwise, FUCKING SUCKS ASS! Sorry for the outburst. This is not match.com’s fault, and a few reviewers had enough perspective to see this. Even right now, unhappy so far, I do not blame match.com for the reality of human life.
Profile Nazis! (Associating them with Nazis is insulting… to Nazis) I do blame them for making my profile into an almost lame pile of crap. You can not post anything without it being reviewed first. It turns out these reviewers are there to remove any signs of life from your passages. I tried several times to include humor on my common thread with everyone there, online dating. DELETED! I reposted several times trying to get the text I wanted up without edits. For instance, there is a section about what I like to do “for fun:”. I thought I would be clever and post up an edited version of the definition of the word ‘adventure‘. They hacked and slashed at every attempt. It was like trying to find a password that would meet corperate policy without knowing the rules! /grr
14 men to 1 woman: Match.com does not actually post thier stats, but you can easily go to other sites like asiafriendfinder.com and find thier stats per geographical location. 14 to 1 (in some cases) 8 to 1 in others. Exact ratio doesnt matter much, just a lot worse than a 1 to 1 ratio. Now, for some perverse reason this was not unreasonable, if only suprising. Thinking about it later, the earth is nearly 50/50 men and women. WTF?!
Slice of white bread: They will send you emails of your matches. The reality is that 75%+ of America is white, the rest are other. Add to that the “fact” that minorities are less internet connected and you get… well what you get. Emails full of white people. I guess i’m predjudiced. My problem not anyone elses really. I find that people not born in America, or 1st generation, have a bit more worldly view.
A moment for reflection: Prove me wrong. Make me eat my words. Let’s actually see one of these sites work. Let’s be honest, the definition of success is sex. In any case, I have not given it the old college try. That’s not fair to me actually. I found several good pictures of just myself. I wrote a good profile that is both free from mistakes and passed the match.com nazi editors. But I have not emailed more than one person. I wonder whether my subscription for 1 month will lapse before I motivate myself to try again…
Educational?: Everything above was a learning experience. I also learned a bit about what I really want in a mate. Filling out the profile, reviewing other profiles; these exercises helped me further define my desires. This has not expanded my pool, sadly. 
February 2nd, 2006 at 10:38 am
Ha, thank god I am not the only one, great review! have you had any online dating site success? I dugg it it
February 2nd, 2006 at 10:56 am
Thanks for the digg. I have not had any success at all so far, but I think as the ratio of men to women stands, I will have to be more aggressive.
–reddogg
June 27th, 2006 at 11:12 am
Well I have to wonder if the ratio is so skewed that there are an assload of men, how come not one of them bothered to respond to my mails…not even the “thanks but no thanks” canned response that requires the push of a button?
None of these men were “out of my league”, I don’t scare little kids and horses and do not outweigh my car. I am gainfully employed and have no issues with exes, no kids and no restraining orders (hee hee.) I make a decent living and being in advertising know how to write a profile. I posted pictures which, according to Match, should result in fifteen times the attention.
After a week, my profile had been read by nearly 150 men. THREE responded (one very geographically undesirable and two mentioned sex in their profiles. At least I sent them letters of thanks but no thanks.) Not one of the letters or winks I sent out ever garnered a response. Personally I think that men mean “women never write back” is “HOT model women never write back” (fake ads, one guy sent me a profile of a girl he was trying to get and it was a photo of Molly Sims.) Average women are “not good enough” for the serial daters who hang out on match.com (apparently hoping Jennifer Aniston will join) and nice guys are few and far between. Anyone without a photo is immediately suspect.
Have thought of saying “never married, five kids, smoker, drink daily and only have HS education” and I bet men would fall from the trees.
Reddogg, get out in the real world which is my game plan. There are too many egoists on match who get off seeing how many suckers email them and this applies to both sexes. I do agree that filling out the profile makes you write down what you really want, so print that list and toss the membership. I have resigned mine. They ask what they can do to make the experience worthwhile, I said “get rid of free profiles” as they have no point. You cannot even see who wrote you without paying anymore. They cannot write back or read your emails. It is only in place to fraudulently boost Match’s member numbers.
Even the founder quit this year and has bashed Match (she started a new online personals site though so gotta wonder.)
June 27th, 2006 at 11:23 am
Wow that is the best reply yet to any of my blog entries! /cheer I may have to print it out and frame it (^_^)b
I quit match.com a few weeks ago and planned on doing a followup, I guess I will have to. Consider me inspired.
September 18th, 2006 at 1:52 am
Sorry it hasn’t worked out for you bud, but Match.com sucks the fat nutzors. I do recommend the free sites. (At least you’re not paying for high expectations right?) The other option is to use a site that has a limited time only option to contact as many people as you want for xx number of days, that way you can check it out to see if its legit and select out viable ‘targets’, or women you’d be interested in meeting. I have had luck in that manner to meet very nice people.
Keep in mind that the internet for a lot of people is the reimagining of the 60s in one large hookup circle. Unfortunately you got to stay on the cutting edge to meet the right women. Cowtowing to world demands and getting a Friendfinder account or Myspace communist account may help mitigate these issues as well. The higher the exposure level, the greater the chance you’ll meet one that works out, that is if you continue to utilize this strategy.
Anyway, next time I come over bud, let’s go up to the local pub, have a few drinks and shoot the breeze man. It’ll help you unwind.
September 2nd, 2008 at 1:13 pm
http://www.okcupid.com/login?p=/mailbox
November 16th, 2008 at 7:55 pm
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/scienceandtechnology/science/3446984/Speed-dating-all-about-looks-and-not-personality.html
Speed dating all about looks and not personality
Forget chat up lines, speed dating is nothing more than a beauty contest – and is all about looks and not personality, claim scientists.